Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Goals of Marriage.

A restaurant meal is always much less of a treat than having his very busy mother cook for the family--something she only did on Sundays. So the question of a restaurant versus a home meal is really symbolic of what makes each of them feel loved. when dreams are respected Why do some couples cope so gracefully with these sorts of issues while others get bogged down? The difference is that the happy couple understands that helping each other realize their dreams is one of the goals of marriage.

One of the great stories in Eastern Philosophy concerns two animals: a scorpion and a frog. The tale goes that one day a scorpion was trapped on the shore of a river, and he needed to get to the other side. He asked a frog he saw swimming out in the water to come get him and take him across. The frog refused. “You are a scorpion,” the frog said. “If I take you on my back, you’ll sting me.” The scorpion said that was foolish, of course he wouldn’t sting him because then he would drown in the river and die, too. The frog thought about it, and agreed that it wouldn’t make sense. He let the scorpion on his back, and then started paddling across the river. When the frog was halfway out, the scorpion stung him. As the frog was dying and they both began to slip under the water, he asked the scorpion why he did it. “It’s my nature. I am a scorpion,” he said. “And scorpions sting.”
The essential interpretation of the story is that every creature has a nature, and you cannot argue against it, or expect it to change. You must accept it for what it is. For example, the nature of my dog is that he will only bark; he will never talk to me in English. To expect otherwise would not only be slightly crazy, but it would leave me disappointed for the rest of my life. I would expect something he could never do.
The same is true of our expectations of women. They have a nature, which we are about to analyze and discuss. To argue against these things – to argue against the way things are – is to cause certain frustration, anxiety, and anger. There are certain traits that people have, and you cannot wish or hope them to be different; they can only be accepted. If someone’s behavior makes you angry or tense, then it is your fault, not theirs. You are the one reacting to them. Remember to see things as they are, not as you wish them to be. Be brave enough to face the Principle of Truth.

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